How to save money on your next remodeling project

A little tongue-in-cheek humor on how to save money on your project

Want a $20,000 job for only $10,00? Read on to find out how you can pay rock bottom prices for your next home improvement project! 

10 East steps for Heartbreak, Misery, Nights of No Sleep and Probably a Divorce!

1.  Do not hire a contractor with a licence! They have to pay annual dues and they pass these dues onto their customers. Why should you have to pay?

2. Make sure the contractor does not have insurance  If he really knows what he is doing why would he buy insurance? If he harms your home or injures your family, just sue him.

3. Workers Comp  insurance is for sissies that get hurt on the job. This type of insurance can cost as much as 40% of your labor bill! It is much cheaper to drag an injured worker somewhere else and claim the accident happened there. Don't let the contractor scare you about the worker going after your homeowner's insurance. Yes, it's true but you can claim they were never there.

4. Lettered trucks and uniformed staff sell one thing: professionalism! Yup and its a bad word- it means "to charge you more money". Why should you care how the poeple are dressed and what they drive? As long as they can make it to the job on most days, their station wagons are fine without fancy lettering.

5. Permits, just a way for the city to make sure the work was being done to industry standards. Do you really want to pay for permit cost and the time to pull permits? Just make the contractor promise to do a good job and make sure he is not crossing his fingers. If the city find that you did the work without a permit, refuse to pay any fines and claim that you are renting the house.

6. Hire a Jack-of-all-trades. Generally their rates are less than a licensed contractor. If the (Handyman) Jack-of-all-trades is not skilled in the trade buy him a "how to" book from Home Depot and read it to him while he is working.

7. Buy the materials yourself and avoid the contractor charging you to pick them up. If you fail to buy enough products make him go back and get more on his own time. Make sure that he does not inspect each product for flaws- it only takes time and time is money. Remember flaws can be hidden with lots of paint and caulking. Bigger flaws can generally be hidden with tarps or by hanging pictures over them.

8. Be willing to accept 3rd rate workmanship! You will more than likely move in a few years so paying for top notch workmanship is nothing short of foolish. When you sell your house do not let the buyers have a home inspection, they might find these flaws and code violations. Offer to buys buyers a few beers prior to them viewing your home. Generally the beers will cause them to overlook a few things.

9. Never ask for references, contractors that do do good work and make people happy feel that they can charge more for their work. You should not be forced to pay for a contractor with a good work history.

10. Look for contractors that move around a lot - they will charge less because they need the work. "Here today and gone tomorrow" really means you will save money today, focus on today.